So this week I have been going through a full-fledged burn out. I have had several unexpected expenses this month. Right now, I only have like $50 to my name. I don't get paid until next Wednesday. I am also worried because I need to finish off my cosplay for NDK in a couple of weeks.
Couple this with my disappointment in myself for not going out. It is just layers upon layers. I was hoping to have a little experience before heading to NDK. ^_^ then again I would not have the proper experience I think... I believe Anime Conventions are more Day Game than they are night game. However, I have always been unclear on that. Plus I will be going with my friends who are more ambient anime fanatics. I don't know... I think I am over thinking and over plotting again... this is a habit I am trying to break. I guess there is always my college homecoming....
Anyway, my mind has been reeling... I sometimes feel like this is not a path for me.... Like I should recluse in and focus on my anime website. Then I remember I am trying to change... lying around at my apartment drinking, playing video games and watching anime is what turned me into the wreck I am now. I won't ever give up the video games and anime, but I will try to go out. I don't know.... I think part of me only wants to do this to say I can... then there is the part of me who wants to try to run the "How To Talk To Girls" panel at an anime convention in a couple of years. I went to one a couple of years ago... it was laughable at best. Just the guy running it asking girls for their opinion and the girls saying "Girls are complex".... I am a bit more out going now... maybe I will go to that panel. After the 2nd or 3rd girl says "Girls are complex" i can say something like "Yes so is a rubix cube".
Anyway my mind has been overactive and I cannot fall asleep, despite being beat from the gym. I just needed to confess and clear my thoughts.
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